Where the darkness of loneliness reigns, let me bring the light of friendship.

Where the darkness of bitterness reigns, let me bring the light of forgiveness.

Where the darkness of hurt reigns, let me bring the light of healing.

Where the darkness of discord reigns, let me bring the light of harmony.

Where the darkness of sadness reigns, let me bring the light of joy.

Where the darkness of doubt reigns, let me bring the light of faith.

Where the darkness of despair reigns, let me bring the light of hope.

Where the darkness of hatred reigns, let me bring the light of love.


how lovely. its time i go to church again.

im back.

shopping is fun!

i think my mom and i bought enough stuff for a refugee camp...

my dad insisted that we cancel our trip cos of the coup, but nobody could stop us. in fact, the trip was really safe.

so we shopped and ate and shopped some more. oh so fun!

and now we've to pack the house cos we obviously dont have enough space to put our new stuff.

well, shopping is fun!

yien's back.

i really miss you girl. just looking at you brings back memories of the many years we spent in ij. you've always been the special friend. i mean everyone knows that liz is my bestest friend. you're the special friend. you're always there for me when i needed someone to talk to. you'll always be looking out for me, making sure im okay. you're almost the big sister i never had. well, though im suppose to be the older one. but everyone knows that phoebe is the kid that needs to be taken care of. (argh, that's embarassing!)

i kinda lost count of the weeks that you've been gone. but it still feels as if we just went out a couple of days ago. every memory i have with you is still so alive. the after school ice-cream, movie or shopping we had was as crazy as it still is. growing up with you was a thrilling ride, and it still is. we use to talk about our thoughts, dreams and aspirations. and i suppose you're the closest to yours so far. im really happy that you've made it so far, and even more happy that you're enjoying your journey.

i never really expected us to still be so close even after so many years. i suppose there's so much of me i've left with you and so much of you i have with me. we may not share the exact interest like you do with mari. but we've still so much to talk about, and it'll never end.

im looking forward to a movie, coffee, ice-cream and shopping! and i think i just made liz really jealous.

to my really special friend - yien. love.

im happy, i always am. at least i try to be. it takes a lot of effort though.

i never really let anything bother me for too long. a problem comes up, i cry a little, talk about it, and in a day, im almost over it. so for the longest time, i was always happy.

but we always meet bigger challenges everyday. and it gets harder, it'll require more effort. i'll cry a little more, talk about it less, and sometimes even after days, i still cant get over it. so for the longest time, i've been trying really hard to be happy.

there are many many things i wanna tell you, you, you and you. and you and you and you too. but its so hard. sometimes its so hard to approach you, sometimes its so hard to get your understanding, sometimes you are too far away, and sometimes you are too busy to listen. i wonder if things might have been different if this had not happened, or that didn't come by. but at the end of it all, everything i've just come up with are just excuses.

sometime i really really wanna talk to you. but it just doesnt seem like the right time. and when the right time finally comes, im either not in the mood to bring it up, or i've already figured out a way to forget about it. and this is just another excuse. sigh.

problems make everyone upset. and to you, you, you and you, and you and you and you too. i want to be there for you. let me help. i might not be able to solve it for you. but things will seem better if you share it with a friend. and it makes me happy to know that you still regard me as one.

so im happy, i always am. let me make you happy too.

i figured that there's a curse on first semesters. i just never seem to do that well. actually i wonder if i even want to do well. you see, if i do well, then i'll have to keep up with the expectations that i'll continue to do well. and if i happen to not do well, everyone will be disappointed. you get me? okay, nvm if you got confused, cos i did.

yea so i got my first "A" for a module after 3 semesters of mass com. and why am i not the least bit thrilled? cos i got a double "D+" for 2 other modules. what was i thinking? actually, im happy i passed. God has been too kind to me. not that i wished i had failed. but i wouldnt be too surprised if i failed a module or two.

but yea, that whole semester was a rollar coaster. i enjoyed it as much as i hated it. actually, i dont think i hated it. i dreaded it. but actually, i didnt dread going to school. i love school. i love seeing lots and lots of people, especially observing their weird actions.

perhaps next semester would be a more enjoyable ride. for now, i cant wait for the shopping trip to bangkok! whee...

peter's jean isn't doing too good.

she's in the hospital under observation by guys in white coats and ladies in short skirts. hmm. sounds kinky.

ok, seriously, it sounds bad. and i hope she gets well soon.

i like going out with my momma.

it sounds different each time i play it - 95 times.

sometimes it sounds sad, sometimes happy.

sometimes it seems fast and upbeat, sometimes slow and calm.

sometimes it feels like i know it so well, sometimes like im listening to it for the first time.

its rather interesting how a song can explain your feelings so well.

"Hi, are you from poly?"

i nod my head.

"Which year?

i make the sign, 'two', with my fingers.

"What time are you going to work till? Btw, i'm Edward"

i make the sign, 'eight', with my fingers, and i nod my head. i remind myself to smile and be nice.


so apparently, this guy from work is trying to get to know me by writing notes and flashing them through the glass panel from the other room, while i was in the conference room.

try harder dude.

something quite fancy,
i'd rather not say.
perhaps if i keep quiet,
it'll all go away.

it is not responding,
i don't quite know why.
i wish i really knew,
i should get a spy.

it went on and off,
once in a long while.
but it was quite nice,
it really made me smile.

i havent been to church for more than a month.

maybe i should start going again.

now that...

jaime has a boyfriend, we go out a lot less often.

lye urn has a girlfriend, we hardly watch movies or laugh at random things.

liz, peter and yien are overseas, i hardly use my mobile.

its the holidays, im more bored than ever!
and i miss me god momma jean.

yien's coming back. i wonder if she'll bring back a big green bag of mint M&Ms. yum. in fact, i can't decide if im more excited about yien or Mr M&Ms! okok, i think im a little more excited about you coming back yien.

comex at the expo. apple@orchard sent me a really tempting email. macbooks and ipods. things i don't want but feel the need to have it. interesting how it becomes a need instead of a want. eh? i think im confused. anyway, i might just psycho myself to get a new ipod video to replace my dying ipod mini. or maybe i'll psycho my parents to get it for my birthday, which is coming... in a few months. lovely.

oh yea, i've not had coffee for 2 weeks and 1 day! and i was just wondering back then while i was busy with all my projects about how i would just die without coffee. oh well, i survived!